Everyday Yogini

To be honest, getting to Rome wasn’t easy for me emotionally. I went from a really comfortable situation with a great support system, built-in volunteer opportunities, a community I cared a great deal about, lots of kids around, my own house, a large yard and playground in front of self-same house, with the Rocky mountains being a close neighbor, etc. It was a dream come true for me.

But, my husband hated the job he had there.

On the other hand, we saw him a lot. We ate dinner together 90% of the time. We did lots of fun stuff together outdoors. In my estimation, he had great work-life balance.

Except, again, he hated his job.

Then, this opportunity for Rome came along which meant two moves in quick succession and putting Clara into full-time daycare. It meant doing lots of things that I am not fundamentally good at, namely, being social, being tactful, and learning a new language. I was exhausted within a few months of getting to DC and we hadn’t even gotten to the goods yet (meaning Rome)! I was also seriously grieving having to leave behind Colorado.

So now we’re here and it’s fun and, just like any place, there are things I love and things I don’t love. But I’m still trying to figure out where I fit in the picture. Or really, how I want to fit in the picture. Hence, my need for a visual blueprint of what’s fundamental to my happiness… I am a person who needs reminders.

So, the pyramid: the fact that health an wellness is on the bottom of the pyramid does not indicate for me that I spend the majority of my time on myself, in fact, what it means is that without my health and at least some time for myself, eventually, it all falls apart. Our bodies, minds, and spirits only have so much savings we can withdraw.

What I love is that a lot of the stuff that keeps me healthy, I can do with Clara or Erick or friends or all of them! Cooking, eating, and exercise are three great things that work in all the areas of my pyramid. Some of my fondest memories in the first year or two of Clara’s life are of walking almost every morning with a friend and neighbor who also had kids. The kids would happily (most of the time) enjoy the scenery from the comfort of their joggers while we got to chat. It was fabulous! Also, the time spent with my Mommy group was, for me, essential to my health and well-being, but also felt like an indulgence.

The two things that I grapple with most right now are how do my writing and teaching fit into our lives (without taking over too much of my time)? And, how involved do I want to/need to be in my husband’s job to stay connected to him yet keep my sanity? How do I do these two things and also keep us all plugged in, since his job keeps him so busy now?

So this year, for me, on very important intention is to find our family balance again. Trying to figure out where we each fit into this new picture. This is a pretty abstract intention for the year, but it’s so important for us.

Some more concrete New Year intentions/goals that came to me from doing this were the following:

-Slowly, slowly I must let go of sugar (level 1 and 2). It doesn’t work for me and I’m just not the kind of person who can have one cookie. An sad and unfortunate truth. If you are the kind of person who is naturally moderate, I envy you. The luck! Why level 2 as well, you might ask? Well, because I’m intolerable to my husband when I’m eating sugar.

-I want to incorporate Clara into cooking meals more often. She is old enough now to start working with me in the kitchen and, since she is at school part of the day, that will be a great way for us to reconnect after school (level 1 and 2).

-I am going to take on some private clients (as I’ve mentioned). For now, just two, and see how this impacts the balance of everything (level 3). Although I need to be mindful of the time it takes, I will continue to blog and write and see where that leads, too.

-Travel! This is our opportunity! I have a list a mile long of places we need to visit while we are here… plus, that supports family time (level 2 and 4)! Win-Win!!

So, although it’s a pretty circuitous route to get to a few goals for the year, the point of creating the pyramid is that I want to spend the great majority of my time on the things that I will look back on fondly and with pride as I get older.

Boiled down to it’s essence, my happiness and fullfilment revolve around relationships, and being fully present with the people and experiences in my life. My husband is always telling me he thinks that I will look back at this time as one of the highlights of my life. He may be right. But I suspect it will be more for the experiences we share as a family (including the food, of course!), and the connections we make as we build a community here in Rome and less about the glamour of our position.

Be well, be happy, and be mindful into the holidays and beyond!

This entry was posted on Thursday, December 13th, 2007 at 6:43 am and is filed under Everyday Life: Italy, Everyday Parenting, Intention, Nourishing our Bodies. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.