Everyday Yogini

The magic number.

Check it out and join in. From craftivism to arts designed to raise awareness of climate change, this organization is well worth supporting and joining.

There is nothing better than hope to inspire action.

I wish I could bottle these things.  I really do.  Last night, about nine pm, I was going through our goodnight ritual with Clara when all of a sudden, we heard a marching band strike up a tune.  At first, Erick and I thought there must be an event at the Canadian or Chinese Embassy…  

I threw open the windows to take a look and there was a marching band playing in front of the Chinese Embassy!  Erick and I laughed and shook our heads.  You just never know what is going to happen here!  A few weeks ago there were protesters in the same spot…

We all fell asleep to live music last night- it was beautiful.  I had no idea what it was all about, but this morning, it hit me.  The band was playing in tribute to the victims of the Sichuan earthquake!   

I’m not absolutely certain that is what the music was about, but there is no other explanation, really.  I find the desire to comfort and show goodwill to be such a life-giving impulse that we all share.  No matter what government policies and positions are, the fact remains that we are all sons and daughters, friends and family, mothers and fathers.  We all experience tragedy and we all have the capacity for compassionate responses to others. 

I just love that.  I really, really love that we are all connected in this fundamental way.   

Initially, I had planned a human rights post about school lunches and then I read about the earthquake that struck China earlier this week. The first images I saw of the quake were of a young mother carrying her child while the earth shook and debris fell. It took my breath away.

The first thing I thought of was how I would respond and what I would be feeling in such circumstances. My next thought (and action) was to sit down and practice metta (loving kindness) meditation for all those who are touched by this disaster.

May all those touched by this tragedy be filled with loving kindness,
May they be cared for with food, shelter, and water,
May they be comforted and comfort those around them,
May they find their lives somehow blessed through this tragedy.

If you wish to donate to the relief effort in the Sichuan province of China, you can go to theGlobal Goodness Blog for more information on using your dollars to help those in need. I would also encourage everyone to send metta during your meditation practice in the days and weeks to come.

Today, I heard an amazing podcast on Speaking of Faith with Matthew Sanford. I was in tears during parts of the interview- a truly inspiring show.

But that’s not really the main point. Public Media is advertising a game called consumer consequence and it allows you to calculate how sustainable your lifestyle is and compare it to others. It also provides tips on reducing environmental footprint. Here is a link to the game.

I scored a 3.2, mainly because at the moment we either walk or take the bus 95% of the time. If we were back in Colorado, forget about it! One thing I have committed to here, is not buying things that need to be shipped unless I absolutely cannot find the item in Italy.

I really, really love coffee.

This is my third day without coffee and I’m sad. I miss it. That zingy, sharp feeling of being buzzed and lively. But seeing as this is all about learning to listen to my body and cultivate a deep sense of loving-kindness in life, I have to give it up.

See, over the last weeks, I’ve had recurrences of the pain and discomfort that I was having pre-surgery. It’s been frustrating and exhausting and I’ve been fighting it. And losing. Which isn’t a very kind way of being with one’s body: battling and all. The only way I seem able to be pain-free at this point is with dietary changes, so, as much of a bummer as it is, I have to let go of some things that I love to eat (and drink, as in my beloved coffee).

So, in the process of giving in to the reality of the situation, there is loss but there is also this sense of stopping long enough to say, “Hey, body, what do you need? What works for you?” And I’m getting some good answers and doing my best to really listen. I’m extraodinarily grateful that I’ve been practicing Yoga and meditation long enough to be able to tune in. Ten years ago, this would not have been possible for me, that is for sure.

Surrender is an okay place to be, much to my suprise.

When we left Colorado, we kept our home in a cohousing community. You may or may not know what cohousing is all about, but one of my neighbors sent out this great video that is available on the internet. If you are interested in learning more, you can see the webumentary here.

I found after living in cohousing, that I crave a community of like-minded individuals! What a suprise that has been for me as a natural introvert! I loved being able to go out my front door and have spontaneous play-dates and conversation about the current state of… anything! All that good stuff being said, there are many things about cohousing that can get really annoying, but overall, I think the positive aspects far outweigh the negative and I look forward to the day when we will return to our home.

To me, cohousing is a great way to have intergenerational friendships, provide “grandparents” for Clara, is a source of great frustration (and therefor emotional and spiritual growth), and is a terrific way (on a very local level) to make the world a more beautiful and loving place. I loved being able to cook for my neighbors, volunteer my skills for the betterment of the community, and be a part of such an amazing web of connection and friendship.

May you all sustain, and be sustained by, your respective communities, Yoginis! Have a lovely weekend…

“Modern” Yoga is based on a book written around 5000 BC by the sage Yoga philosopher, Pantajali. He wrote a book called Pantajal Yoga Sutra, in which he detailed the path of Astanga Yoga (NOT to be confused with the current craze of Ashtanga Yoga, a physical STYLE of asana practice).

In Sanskrit, “Ashta” means Eight and “Anga” is limbs so the literal translation is the Eight Limbed path. The eight limbs consist of the Yamas and Niyamas (the ideal actions and behaviors of Yoginis), Asana (physical postures), Pranayama (breath control), Pratyahara (maintaining perspective), Dharana (mindfulness), Dhyana (Meditation), and, finally, Samadhi (enlightenment, or perfect happiness).

Now, here is a confession. I practiced Yoga asana and pranayama for many years before I learned ANYTHING about the other limbs of Yoga. Frankly, it just didn’t speak to me. In fact, it sort of freaked me out. I began studying Buddhism, because the language appealed to me so much more than the Yogic language. THEN I found out that Budda was a Yogi before he was the Buddha!! So, essentially, Buddhism is built on the foundation of Yoga. I began studying Yoga philosophy at that juncture and found many, many similarities between the two philosophies, and Yogic philosophy became something I could relate to as young, modern, practicioner. And honestly, for me, studying Buddhism first made it a lot easier for me to translate Yogic philosophy into something that made sense for my life.

First and foremost, an essential daily practice for me consists of Asana (physical posture), Pranayama (breath control) and dhyana (meditation). This sounds overwhelming, doesn’t it? But let’s look closer. On a very busy day, I might find time for 3 or 4 of my favorite postures. Later in the day, when something is posing a challenge to me, I might stop and practice belly breathing for 2-4 minutes. Before bed, I might then take a seat on my meditation cushion for five minutes. Maybe 15 minutes of “formal” practice, but what an impact those precious minutes can have in grounding me, which helps me bring the other limbs of Yoga into everyday life!

Throughout the day (the goal being to *always* be in this place), in all my endeavors, I strive to be fully present and mindful (dharana), while staying above how I think things “should” be (pratyahara, or maintaining perpective).

The Yamas and Niyamas are an interesting dimension to all this. I found that by practicing meditation, asana, and pranayama while working to bring a mindful perpective to my daily life, the ideals of the Yamas and Niyamas began to organically shape my behavior. However, you could also consciously begin working with them (I think the best place to start is ahimsa, or non-violence) and, quite naturally, you would find yourself being more mindful with a larger perspective in your daily life. It depends entirely on what appeals to you.

In any case, the last stop on the modern path of Yoga is Samadhi, or enlightenment. Doesn’t this sound sooooo spacey and unattainable?? In reality, for me and most mere mortals, this is, simply put, living your Yoga. Being in a place of perfect happiness and peace, no matter what is happening. Equanimity, or, what I like to refer to as, everyday enlightenment.

Imagine that you have had your brief formal practice for the day, and you are making lunch for your children. You are totally in the moment, from taking in the happy sounds of your children playing and the smell of the nourishing food your are preparing, to the feel of your feet solidly touching the earth. The sun is coming through the window, warming your back. But, with your perspective of wisdom, you are filled with gratitude for the moment, because you know, like everything, it will soon change.

Fast forward 15 minutes in the future: the children are now hitting a blood sugar low because they are so hungry. They have begun fighting with each other, the phone is ringing and lunch is burning. You banged your head on a cabinet running for the phone and well, still, you are mindful. You recognize, with your perspective, that this, too, is a fleeting moment, quite different from your previous moment, but still yours to live out. You gently seperate the children, giving them both some hugs and reassurance, make some peanut butter sandwiches and veggie sticks and sit down with some ice on your head. It’s just a moment, just a circumstance and it doesn’t impact the spaciousness of your heart or the stillness of your mind. It is, simply, life. To be lived fully, both in challenge and delight.

Okay, that would be nice, but even if it doesn’t play out exactly like this (which, if you are anything like me, it won’t)…

What is fabulous to note, as a busy, modern woman is that LIFE IS THE HEART OF PRACTICE!!! We don’t have to go navel-gaze in the Himalayas. It can all happen in your kitchen, the cubicle, the subway…. wherever we are, a practice is available in each and every moment! And maybe, 10 or 100 or even 1,000 lifetimes from now, after lots of stumbling around on the path, maybe we will reach Buddha status… but in the meantime, we can all settle for glimmers of freedom and perfection on the path of everyday enlightenment.

Remember my fabulous epiphany?

Well, it’s painfully clear to me that I’m not done with my food struggles quite yet, despite my enlightened mind (insert fits of laughter). I have lots of excuses. Some of them are really good. But, in the end, they don’t matter. It’s like I’ve always said, apologizing for being a jerk doesn’t mean anything unless you stop being a jerk.

So often any more, my life closely mirrors my beliefs about the kind of person I am and am becoming. It used to be that I would want to be a certain way, but my life was sometimes (okay, often) the polar-opposite of my desire. With gratitude in my heart, I can say that Yoga, meditation, and a good therapist have done wonders to help me become the person I am and want to be.

And when an aspect of my life is far away from the vision of my ideal, I get really frustrated and uncomfortable, especially when it’s something like FOOD that I’ve dealt with time and time again.

So, having said that, I am here to humbly lay out my plan to work through this:

*Write it down- whatever goes in my mouth, goes down on paper. No exceptions. Not even if it’s Clara’s two bites of leftover dinner.

*Plan what is going into my mouth as best as I can. Whole grains, veggies, fruit, fish… it’s all here, in abundance and beauty, at the markets, and I love to eat that way. Yum!

*Run and/or walk four times a week. A mood shifter and energy lifter for sure, and now that I’m not sick, very doable.

*Yoga, Yoga, Yoga. Increased practice everyday with extra meditation time. This keeps me in my body and decreases mindless eating.

*Focus on being kind to myself. Stopping myself from eating that cookie or dipping into the frosting for Clara’s birthday cake. Walking away. Deep breathing. Letting go. This is the tricky one for me, where my mind gets slippery. Because it really, really feels like eating that creamy bit of frosting is going to make things better (which it doesn’t). And, it IS so hard to stop doing the habitual thing, the thing that feels right in the moment, isn’t it?

And knowing that kindness toward myself will be the undoing of this demon, I will bring together a list of ways I can be kind to myself so I remember. Because in moments like these, I find that just thinking that it will be kinder to walk away doesn’t do it. I need concrete actions that tell me I am worth more than that… baths, lighting a candle, a list of reasons I want to abstain, etc.

Any ideas are welcome. And if you, too, are struggling with the holidays or your own bit of stress and take it out on yourself with food, I would surely welcome company on the journey to the other side…

I have these revelations periodically about food. Sometimes, food is working for me, and sometimes, the food is swinging me around like a sumo wrestler might. Like right now, for instance, I seem to be falling into the latter category.

To be upfront, I’m a stress eater.

So, we just moved to a different country, right? This is a little bit stressful. We are also being entertained a lot, with tons of yummy, super-fattening, creamy, delicious foods. And desserts? Don’t get me started. I mean, I’m in a new country, I deserve a dessert or two after every meal, right??

Last night we got home from an event with not-so-good food that I ate with gusto, just to top it all off with very yummy dessert(s). I felt terrible when I got home, really, just icky. My stomach hurt, I had a headache and I though to myself, “Why do I do this??”

Indeed, an excellent question. And one I’ve asked myself many times before.

Back when I began this blog, I started with some talk about yogic philosophy. I plan to finish up that discussion eventually, but other things, like moving across the ocean, seem to keep popping up. But anyway, as I asked myself this very important question last night, “WHY do I do this to myself?” the answer came in the form of an EPIPHANY. Not a new epiphany, but one worth repeating, nonetheless.

Overeating to the point of feeling terrible physically and mentally is an act of violence towards myself. There is also a quality of greed and dishonesty to taking so much and stuffing it in my mouth that it distracts me from the underlying stress. The greed is obvious, I am taking more than I physically need, right? It is dishonest because by eating so much that I feel self-loathing, I don’t have to feel the discomfort of the enormous changes I’m going through. An act of violence, you bet. My body doesn’t need this excess food, and I end up mentally flogging myself, and that often leads to more stress-eating. It’s vicious, and I would never, ever do such a thing to someone else. So, with this oh-so-common act, I move far, far away from my commitment to the yogic precepts.

But the antidote is so clear. The EPIPHANY, if you will. It often feels like an act of self-care to eat the food. It is comforting, in the moment. But the reality is, that for that moment of pleasure, come many more moments of discomfort and an inability to really engage with my life because of my mental gyrations around what I’ve done and how my body feels. The truly kind, honest and greedless thing to do, the antidote, is to walk away. To take only what I need. To be mindful of the outcome if I eat the extra dessert, to act on the knowledge I have of myself, and, just like I do with my daughter, kindly and compassionately set limits in my true best interests. To learn to be with the discomfort of the moment.

When I think about doing this, there is a moment of tension, and then it just feels so spacious and truly comforting. So, as I continue to move through all these changes, and the holidays, and the food, I am committed to bringing my Yoga practice to bear on my experience. To be in the moment, to fully engage with my life, instead of grappling with my issues around food. To act in my own best interest with kindness, generosity, and integrity.

But I’m sure this will include some dessert.

Yoga is a spiritual practice, with principles to guide our actions in everyday life. Every one of these principles moves us towards less negative impact: on the people around us, on ourselves, and on the environment.

About a year ago, I donated all of my yoga mats (I had 6, in different colors) to Goodwill Industries and purchased an eco-friendly Yoga mat, made without PVC (Polyvinyl chloride). My yoga blocks were made from renewable cork, so they already met my new “green” standard for my Yoga props.

There are easy things we can all do, as Yoga practicioners, or just as global citizens that want to make a difference in how we live on this planet and use resources. Below, is my top 10 list of actions we can take to be Green Everyday Yoginis!

Top 10 Eco-actions for Yoga Practicioners:

1. Ask your local Yoga studio to ‘Go Green’
2. If your studio sells retail items, ask them to stock eco-friendly products
3. Find your way to Yoga class with public transportation
4. Buy yourself Eco-friendly Yoga Products (hopefully from your studio, that you asked to stock them!)
5. Use a natural cleaner for your new, eco-friendly Yoga mat
6. Use soy wax, or other non-petrolatum candles during your home practice
7. When buying cute new Yoga togs, focus on companies selling eco-friendly, renewable-resource clothing
8. Nourish your body, and your Yoga practice, with local, organic food
9. Join, and participate in, an organization that supports your values, your community, and the world.
10. Spread the word! Tell your friends what you are doing and ask them to join you!

How do you “green” your practice and your life? I’m looking forward to hearing from you…