Everyday Yogini

Today, I used Blogbooker to create a keepsake of this blog.  Mainly because the time has come to let go of this blog and step fully into the care and feeding of my new venture.  Back when I started this blog, we were getting ready to move to Rome.  I was experiencing a very deep and painful transformation - burning through outdated beliefs, questioning my worth, sitting squarely in that uncomfortable in-between state of not knowing…  changing at a fundamental level.  I was so scared!  Keeping this blog helped me feel my way through the changes that had shattered who I was and helped me vision and put together a new, more authentic life for myself.

In some of my first posts, there were hints of what it would lead to (helping others through coaching, mentoring and teaching).  This was from maybe my 10th post:

Making peace with our demons

Saturday, September 22nd, 2007So as I am working with my worry, the message that is arriving from all directions is what I mentioned yesterday~ embracing it, discovering compassion for the parts of myself I wish to push away (in this case, worry). I came across this passage by Thich Nhat Hanh yesterday and was just STRUCK by the realization that I have the ability to transform this “demon” into a gift for myself and those around me. To develop greater understanding and depth as a result of the thing that is so painful right now.

Thank goodness for my yoga and meditation practice.  Through those practices, lots of tears, the work, and blogging as a way to coach myself (before I realized what coaches were and got my own!!)- I came through, better than ever, with a nothing short of a calling and the absolute belief that all of us have the power to be exactly who we are meant to be for ourselves and the world, and be truly, authentically happy doing it.

Now that I’ve been formally coaching for a little while, I’ve discovered that my favorite people to work with are moms who are super busy with all kinds of ventures or businesses outside of the the work of parenting.  Fabulous women who are striving to change the world, doing so much in their communities and for others, and they make it look so effortless - but it doesn’t FEEL effortless. It can feel really overwhelming…

I love helping these women find elegant solutions in their lives.  Organic, simple solutions that make everything easier - that help them recognize their brilliance and relax and enjoy their crazy, beautiful lives.  A shift in perspective that gives them some mental space and breathing room so they can make the BEST choices for themselves, their businesses, and their families.   Oh how I can go on about how amazing and beautiful these women are and what a delight it is to work with them and see them bloom!!

So there is still Yoga, at my new blog.  There is meditation.  There is all the same stuff that has been here - and more.  If you are interested, come on over.  Subscribe to the blog.   I would be delighted to have you.

Thank you to all of you who have come and read and commented here over the years and have offered such a loving, virtual support for me during this amazing time.  I salute the divine within each and every one of you.

I am so excited about this course, Yoginis!  It is going to be loads of fun and I’m looking forward to working with a great group of people!  For a weekly investment that is less than your typical Yoga class, you get so much…  hope to see you there.

Do you want help, guidance and support to fit a dynamic practice of doing nothing into your life, without moving to a monastary or giving up your high heels? Do you want to connect to inner peace, innate joy, and a focused mind?

Join the More Happy, Less Stress 6-week telecourse! Each week will provide you with detailed instructions on a different type of meditation as well as practice in the art of doing nothing, additional coaching and Yoga tools to assist you, followed by Q&A and coaching around any thoughts that bubble up during practice.

The syllabus:
Week One: Introduction
Talk about intention, using the workbook, and how to approach the practice. What are the benefits of working with the breath. Practice with the essential breath.

Week Two: Mindfulness
Checking in from following week. Working with mindfulness meditation and putting it to work in our lives. Incorporating Yoga into a practice with the 5 movements of the spine. Practice with mindfulness meditation.

Week Three: Mantras
Check in from previous week. Using mantras and their benefits. Cultivating qualities in our lives. Working with daily intentions. Practice with mantra meditation.

Week Four: Loving-kindness, Take 1
Check in from previous week’s practice. Introduction to Loving-kindness meditation. The stages of this technique and choosing your focal people. Writing your own aspiration for the practice. Practicing with loving-kindness meditation.

Week Five: Loving-kindness, Take 2
Check in from previous week. Introducing loving-kindness into your daily life. Living with gratitude and grace. Practice with loving kindness meditation.

Week Six: Life as Practice
An intuitive practice – following your own guidance. What to do with persistent thoughts (aka: coaching yourself). Meditation practice, your choice.

To sign up, go to:
http://insighthealthcoaching.com/services/telecourses/

Each call includes:

* 5 – 10 minute introduction & basic instructions
* Breath-work to relax the body and calm the mind
* 5 minutes of practice with the introduced meditation, followed by quick Q&A
* 20 minutes of dedicated meditation time, followed by
* An additional 20 minutes of Q&A plus coaching with Nona Jordan, mind-body coach
and certified yoga and meditation instructor

There are so many reasons to practice the art of doing nothing! Studies show some benefits of meditation to be:

* Increased ability to deal with stress
* Less physical pain
* More mental flexibility
* Greater sense of control and purpose
* Higher immune function
* More peaceful sleep
* Better looking

Okay, I made the last one up, but don’t you think people who are relaxed and happy are much more beautiful??

Classes will be held via teleconference every Monday at 9:00am EST (6:00am PST, and 3:00pm Central European Time) beginning November 9th and with the final class on December 14th.

Introductory price: $69.00 (less than the cost of a Yoga class each week!)

For more info and to sign up, go to:
http://insighthealthcoaching.com/services/telecourses/

I know I’ve mentioned Ode Magazine before.  A magazine for intelligent optimists.  I definitely consider myself among that group!  I get magazines on a bit of an odd schedule due to general mail wonkiness overseas, meaning I just received my August issue of Ode.  The entire issue is devoted to laughter: how it evolved, how it helps us, how it heals us.  The last one I’m particularly interested in… the benefits of laughter Yoga as part of healing our bodies.  It’s a short and sweet article, if you care to read up on the subject.

This week I had an epiphany about my coaching blog and how I want it to look and feel for the readers who come and hang out, I would love your input!  After all, it’s about you (if you read it), not about me.  I also wrote an entry about the purpose in pain, a topic close to my heart that I believe in passionately.  And, as always, some gratitude.  I was referring to my weekly gratitude practice as a well-loved life, but thought it would be more appropriately called Gratitude Junkies.  Gratitude has figured prominently in my own life as a vehicle to view challenges in a new light, so I often refer to myself as a gratitude junkie.  I love company in practicing gratitude - either on your own blog or, in the comments.

May your week be filled with laughter and happiness.  See you next week…

I just wanted to share with you some excellent news that arrived in my inbox this morning!  Everyday Yogini has been listed on another “Top Yoga Sites” list!  What a boost to my day!  The folks who compiled the list at Physical Therapy Assistant Schools did a lot of work to summarize what the blogs are all about.  And there are some great blogs listed, so please, go check it out!

Also, a while ago, I was listed on the Top Yoga sites list for X-Ray Technicians school and I failed to mention it.  Their list is comprehensive and worth exploring as well. 

What other blogs do you read and love that are related to mindfulness, Yoga, healing, and closing the gap between who you are and who you want to be?  I would love to check out some new stuff. 

 Have a wonderful Tuesday!!

A full and rich life includes not only good times and happiness, but also low points and sadness.  We all know that, but many of us resist it, myself included.   

Over the past few months, while this blog has been relatively quiet (for me, anyway), things have been sort of not so great.  Not terrible, but, not great.  Being who I am, I am incapable of writing anything of real value without first being upfront about my own inner landscape.  This is probably a fault of epic proportion, but it is true.  

A few months ago, a neighbor from our home in the States was killed, tragically, in his home.  The details are gruesome and not worth repeating.  What is worth saying is that my neighbor was an amazing man, a pillar of the community, who was one of the first people outside of my family to hold my child.  He saw Clara take some of her first steps, and he and his wife helped to feed our family when we were trying to figure out how to be parents.  

I cannot even imagine the deep hole that has been left by his death - his family was so close, his children, always at their house with their children.   The feeling of utter helplessness in the face of such unthinkable circumstances has left me tired.  I cried on and off for days after I heard the news, but, after all, I am not family, I live thousands of miles away, and, in reality, am not terribly close to the family.  I want so much to reach out to my neighbor’s wife, but am struck by my insignificance and end up confused as to whether my efforts are more for my comfort or hers.  Hence, I do nothing but pray for her and the kids.

During all this, Clara was sick for, oh, five months.  After five months of quiet desperation (okay, not so quiet, really), finally, we were able to get a diagnosis, which is so simple, it’s silly.  The sweet girl is allergic to eggs and mold.  Finally, we are seeing improvement.  She’s sleeping, she’s going to the bathroom, her eyes are no longer swollen and runny, and her mood is improving.  My relief is huge, my gratitude for finding out relatively quickly is  immense. But it made for a hard winter.

Speaking of hard winter, last year, I thought my problem was simply being new to life in Rome. After this year, I now know, I cannot stand Rome in winter.  Thank goodness winter is not so long here, but it has seemed interminable.  I lived in the northwest most of my life, so I am okay with rain - it doesn’t bother me.  But this year, Rome saw more rain than I’ve ever seen in a short period of time.  It has been abysmal.  And I’m not exaggerating.  It’s finally sunny, and maybe that’s why I finally feel compelled to write again.

Added to all this, I have been unable to run.  And in my life, little exercise = little energy. Even with a consistent practice of Yoga and meditation, I need (NEED) serious aerobic exercise.  To maintain energy, to keep my perspective, to feel positive about life.  You might imagine, I really needed those things this winter, and they were unavailable to me.

With any luck, this doesn’t sound like whining.  I hope not, anyway.  For now, the sun has returned to Rome and it feels like Spring is on the way.  Clara is on the mend, and my heart is a softer, more tender place for losing my neighbor.  It’s the full experience, right?  How could I possibly feel the joy I feel when I see a blue sky had the rain not seemed endless?  How could I possibly see how lucky we are to have good medical care and a healthy child without the experience of her being ill for so long?  My list of gratitude could circle to world…

Ebb and flow, contraction and expansion, yin and yang- however we choose to refer to it, it is simply life in all it’s glory.  Our work is to lean in and be present to the full, rich and unedited, messy reality.  It can be difficult to sit with our strong emotions and our life challenges, to not try to wiggle away from the uncomfortable experiences and get back to the good stuff.

But, it IS worth it to try, if for nothing else than to stop fighting a good 50% of life experiences.      

I’ve seen lots of reports that, despite the economic downturn, people in the states are still giving.  In fact, my friend Connie sent me this email last night, detailing her own efforts to contribute to global peace and sustainability:

“I am on a mission and I am hoping that you can help me spread my message and/or purchase one of my Dirty Footprints paintings.  You see, today I listed all of my paintings at exactly $10 a piece.  Every penny of that will be donated to my absolute favorite charity: Women For Women International.  This organization does amazing work helping women of war torn areas empower and heal themselves while creating communities of peace.  You can learn more about the incredible work they do by visiting both my blog Dirty Footprints Studio HERE or directly on their website HERE.”

I just made my yearly charity donation, and, funny enough, it happened to be to Women for Women this year. If you can, please support Connie and/or Women for Women.

Thanksgiving rocked this year, Yoginis. Seriously good times, like I’ve never had before. First things first, I did all the cooking for the first time in my life. I’ve never felt compelled to do the complete, crazy, table-full of over-abundant goodness. I’ve preferred to eat with family or neighbors… but of course, being in Rome, what’s a girl to do?

Invite some guests and do it yourself, that’s what.

After hours of consultation with my Dad, step-Mom, and Mother, I had the final menu planned. I even bought an American turkey. Just to be safe. I just didn’t know if Italian turkey would behave the same way in an oven… anyway, with a flutter of nervousness in my belly, I set to work making pie crusts and butterflake rolls last weekend, and, if the rave reviews are any indication, I did my great-grandma proud. The turkey and stuffing were both sweet and juicy, just as it should be. The veggies were perfectly done to a tender crisp yumminess, not to mention the creamy goodness of the mashed potatoes and gravy. The best part for me was hearing the rapt silence around the table as everyone savored the pumpkin-pecan pie with fresh whipped cream (that had my Mother’s secret ingredient).

Perhaps you wonder how my gluten and dairy-free-ness held up under the intense pressure of the holiday. Well, it didn’t. I decided to enjoy the friggen holiday and eat all the delicious food I made. Perhaps enough time has passed since the procedure, but it seemed to be okay. Not perfect and not something my body would be able to handle every day, but oh, the sheer joy of eating pie and rolls and stuffing.

I reflected deeply while I was cooking. Reflected on all the blessings that make up the tapestry of my life, and my heart was filled with a gratitude that defies description. It felt timeless and endless. It felt so good.

Of course, first and foremost, I am grateful for a healthy, spirited daughter and a loving, devoted husband. Given my dating track record, it is truly miraculous that Erick waltzed into my life and whisked me off to Idaho.

Living in Italy is amazing. I love being here so much. The food and the culture have captured my heart. From the crazy drivers, to the defensive walking, it is so full of dynamic connections between people. Going back to DC a few weeks ago really brought that home for me. I missed the chaos and the humanity of it all.

Related to that is my job at the Embassy. It could have been any position, but it just so happened it ended up being a position that I actually enjoy so much that I would like to do similar work when we return to the States. That is wild serendipity is what that is, Yoginis.

I’ve spoken before about how my ongoing pain and illness have proven to be a great teacher and a blessing. I have learned patience and surrender in new ways - I am a better person for having experienced all that I have in the last year. I’ve written oodles on this already - enough said.

The more mundane things that bring happiness to my heart right now are the holiday music playing on the classical music station here, the fake Christmas tree that we put up last weekend (it’s so gorgeous!! I can’t believe it!), Clara’s darling holiday clothes, our growing list of holiday events to attend and put on, and, finally, a Christmas trip to Austria to pack for.

But of course, gratitude isn’t simply about recognizing all the good things we have, but seeing the blessing in the dark circumstances. Take some time during the holidays to reflect on some experiences that you’ve always viewed as negative and look for all the blessings that were a direct result of the difficulty. See what you find and see if you can continue to think of difficulty in the same way…

Many blessings to you and your families during this holiday season, Yoginis! In gratitude for all the wisdom you share with me…

How I wish I were going to say to you all, “I’m healed!  Pain free, and I’m here to tell you my amazing secrets of healing…” Nope.  Not this post.  But, I haven’t posted for a while about my ongoing saga with daily pain, so I thought today would be a good day. 

To be quite honest, I don’t really like to dwell on it. It just is what it is, but, I feel compelled to write about it when I have big leaps in my understanding of why I’m on this path. And over the last few weeks, this is just what has happened.

It started with me being a bit malcontent with my weight. I haven’t gone above what, for me, has been an ideal weight for years. 135, to be precise. This was my weight in high school and it is the weight I strove for, post-Clara. However, last year, when I was feeling quite a bit worse than I do now, I lost an additional ten pounds. Slowly, I gained it back over the last six to seven months, post-procedure. Which is a good thing, right? To feel like eating normally?? Yes, this IS a good thing, unless you are an emotional eater (like me) who also likes to eat VOLUME. I like to eat LOTS of food. And when I was running 35 miles a week, it didn’t matter, but now? My body isn’t so hip on pounding pavement for 35 miles a week, so I needed to find another way. And I knew it was not going to involve a diet. I have come to a point in my life where dieting just isn’t appealing. I would rather fix the cause, not the effect.

You might ask, “Well, if you are at your supposed goal weight, then what’s the problem??” There isn’t a problem, per se, but I knew that there was going to be a problem if I kept going with the current eating extravaganza!

So, seriously, I don’t even know what led me to look on Martha Beck’s website. (You know, Oprah’s favorite life coach?) I have a deep love, hate relationship with Oprah, and typically avoid her experts. But, for whatever reason, I’m looking around and I find this telecourse that I can just download and I compulsively purchase it.

This was $45.00 well spent for me, Yoginis.

This amazing coach, Brooke Castillo just SPEAKS to me. I’ve heard it a million times, “Eat when you are hungry, stop when you are satisfied”. I’ve even had periods of time where I did this- normally in conjunction with a diet or, most recently, this illness. This woman is a certified Martha Beck coach, but she also draws on Pema Chodron (one of my favorites) and then, another name that I typically avoid, Byron Katie of “The Work”fame. But, dammit all, after listening to the tele-course and just feeling like I had been given some very good news, I went to check out Byron Katie’s website and dusted off my copy of Loving What Is, which I bought about 10 years ago and it didn’t really do much for me at that time. Well, this time? It really made a lot of sense.

Maybe doing Yoga for so long, maybe having a mystery, ongoing, low-level illness has opened my mind enough to slow down and be willing to watch my thoughts. And it is fascinating stuff. In any case, I am starting to work with this, too, and feeling cleaner, emotionally, than I have in a long time. But actually, I’m veering off course here. Well, a little.

So, things are clicking together: the Brooke Castillo tele-course solidifies, and gives some form to, eating with awareness and mindfulness. I love it. It feels good, it feels right and it feels, most importantly, very healing. Because, when I’m only eating when I’m hungry, and stopping when satisfied, I am naturally eating 5-6 smaller meals a day, which is easier on the ol’ digestion. And, doing Byron Katie’s method is helping me to process the thoughts that fuel my desire to eat an entire plate of brownies if they are within the walls of my home. And I KNOW that if I’m eating in the fashion that Brooke talks about? My body is going to land wherever I should be, which may be 135 or some other weight. My body gets to decide- not my brain.

So, here I am, feeling great about the food I’m putting in my body and feeling emotionally clean and then, I start wondering, “Do I really need to be on Prilosec (daily) in perpetuity?” I recently read an article about how these types of drugs aren’t the greatest thing for our health long-term, and I’ve always known I wanted to get off of them, soooo, let’s try! It’s easy to go back on if need be. My suspicion is that eating smaller meals, focusing on fueling my body, will keep the need for Prilosec at bay, combined with the other stuff I’ve been incorporating into my healing, self-care program.

Speaking of self-care. I am still practicing Yoga, to some degree or another, every day - of course. However, it has changed slightly. Remember when I mentioned that I have been teaching myself Qi Gong? Well, the 100 day course ended up being way too time-intensive for this householder, and I ended up buying Qi Gong for Cleaning, a quick routine that is 10 minutes once you learn it. Every morning, I practice my 10 minute routine, and it feels wonderful. The ideas that I took away from the longer QiGong course that I incorporate into my Yoga practice are: visualizing the health of the organs and also the energy moving through the body, synchronizing the breath with movement, and visualizing during movement- which I use not only during Yoga, but when I’m walking and jogging. None of this is new to me, but my Yoga has slowed considerably and I focus a lot more on deep, abdominal breathing as I move through the postures. I will be talking more about this in later posts…

In all earnestness, I can say that without this ongoing saga of physical pain, I would have missed out. I have had so many amazing opportunities to challenge my idea of who I am, what I believe, and what I am capable of because of this illness. I am learning that I am not my pain, or my thoughts, or even my body- revolutionary! Not only that, but I’m learning how to take care of this body that supports me tirelessly, shedding the dysfunctional ways that I’ve used in the past to disappear.

The only way I can possibly sum up what I have learned to date, is that every irritation, every challenge, every single thing that we think we cannot possibly deal with for one more second- is a precious gift from life, waiting to be opened, waiting to open us to who we are meant to be, taking us down the roads we are really, honestly meant to be on. Perhaps some people are born into this state of grace, but at least for me, without my heartaches, illnesses, and challenges, I would just plod along through life, dumb and (un)happy. In time, I hope to be smart enough to not need the Universe’s “pain” calling card to become more of who I am.

A Yogini can dream, can’t she??

Thank goodness for crafty friends.  Although I aspire to be crafty, I’m a bit lacking.  My friend Gretchen is amazing.  Have you seen her Etsy Store? On a number of occasions, I have emailed her and said, “I need something sort of like this, with a bit of that… do you think you could come up with something?”

And she does.

Evidence #1: The little black cocktail bag

I have a really cute, retro, clutch that I take to cocktail parties, but I wanted an alternative AND, most important, something I could hook on a finger so I can hold my water glass at the same time I’m shaking hands. You can’t imagine how important this is!

So I was chatting with Gretchen and presented her with this problem. Told her I wanted something small, black, felted, and with an art-deco-ish feel. CAN YOU BELIEVE HOW GOOD SHE IS??? I love this little purse so much! It is perfect. Absolutely, 100% perfect.

Evidence #2: The Nature Bowl

Taking inspiration from Soule Mama, I asked Gretchen if she could make me a nature bowl. A place where we could hold all of our seasonal treasures on the dining table, so we could see them, touch them, interact with them…

I am beyond pleased with this bowl- the tiny bowls add an extra dimension of wonder to this set up. Clara is loving switching out what goes into the little bowls. When we are out and about, she looks for things that can place in her little bowls.

Isn’t Gretchen amazing?? I *heart* all things made by hand, with care- especially when those things come from those I love. Thanks Gretchen! I am so inspired by her inspiration, I am going to do most of my holiday shopping on Etsy, or (gasp), make it myself. Wish me luck, and today I leave you with another picture of the nature bowl. Isn’t it perfect?

My dear, sweet Father sent this video to me. You know, I don’t know why people do the things they do. I really don’t. But this? This just filled me with such joy. Honestly, I was brought to tears by the end. Why? I have no idea. But I am grateful that people do these sort of crazy things and share them with the world.

Check it out. Is it not sort of “It’s a small world” for the modern era?