I bought a set of these awesome reusable mesh produce bags for myself from Etsy’s AMK Designs, and you can betcha I will be purchasing these as gifts for folks at Christmas!Aren’t they great??
Is there any day that is “typical” when you have a child? As I have been thinking about Half Pint Pixie’s blog carnival, I have been up in the air on what to write. We are very into routines around here, but it seems they change quite often- at least lately. HPP also indicated that a day in my life might be a bit exotic, since we are in Rome. In relationship to mothering, I think our lives are quite normal, really. We have our daily routines, Clara has playdates, this summer, we’ve gone swimming- a lot- I might add, we have a zoo membership, she watches movies, we eat, etc. Our day as a family is not at all something like, “Oh, our daily picnic at the pantheon was rained out, bummer, I guess we’ll go to the Colosseum…” In fact, we haven’t even SEEN the pantheon. Living here is so weird.
From an American perspective, I think what is unusual and exotic about Clara’s days, is the internationality of it all. Her babysitter from Ghana, her nanny from Finland, her Italian nursery school, her soon-to-be British school, our Pakistani domestic. At least a few times a month, we have people in our home from different countries, different cultures. Our home is a sea of tranquil calm most of the time (which suits all of us) but then we have these interesting international gatherings that Clara sees and experiences and participates in.
Our life here is also punctuated by travel, but that isn’t so unusual either, is it? We just happen to be traveling in one of the most sought-after destinations in the world. In fact, next week, we will be taking a vacation to the northern part of Italy to stay in a kinderhotel. (More to come on that….)
There are certainly differences in how parenting plays out here when we are out and about (for instance, don’t even try to find a playground that’s decent- by American standards- in Rome), but, for the most part, my days resemble any other family’s day: getting up, making breakfast, being where we need to be in the morning, activities planned, friends met, sharing facilitated with said friends, meltdowns, craft-projects, teaching moments, snuggles, bath time, messes, cleaning up, etc. Our most important time as a family is dinner time, and we eat together most nights, unless Erick simply can’t make that happen.
My greatest, on-going, daily challenge with this parenting gig is being present and mindful to what is in front of me- especially when that is Clara. As a child and an adult, I remember craving my Mother’s full attention and never feeling like I had it. It was so frustrating and eventually, I just gave up. My relationship with my Mom is not very close, and I’m sad about that, but I hate being disappointed all the time, so now? Well, it just is what it is.
Lately, I sense this is the same thing that is happening with Clara and I, much to my horror. Her needs just feel so demanding and relentless that I shut down, try and escape from it, which makes her demands that much louder. As I’ve reflected on this, I know what I need to do- I need to lean into it, feel my edges, give in to her needs. Maybe just small increments of time, but still, give her what she wants most. My full, attention on who she is in this very moment.
So, a typical day here is not so much different than it would be if I were back in the United States- Clara is my greatest teacher and, with some luck and some grit, she will learn some things from me, too. Outside of routines and all the machinations of being a parent, it’s about raising a happy adult and, for me, building a lifetime relationship that will sustain all of us through the years. Right now, that means adding conscientious time to our days where I am all Clara’s. No matter how much my mind might resist, no matter how badly I want to wander off and do something else, it means I will stay. Right here, right now, with my beautiful 3 1/2 year old in all her glory.
And, without further ado, I am off to do exactly that.
Thank goodness for crafty friends. Although I aspire to be crafty, I’m a bit lacking. My friend Gretchen is amazing. Have you seen her Etsy Store? On a number of occasions, I have emailed her and said, “I need something sort of like this, with a bit of that… do you think you could come up with something?”
And she does.
Evidence #1: The little black cocktail bag
I have a really cute, retro, clutch that I take to cocktail parties, but I wanted an alternative AND, most important, something I could hook on a finger so I can hold my water glass at the same time I’m shaking hands. You can’t imagine how important this is!
So I was chatting with Gretchen and presented her with this problem. Told her I wanted something small, black, felted, and with an art-deco-ish feel. CAN YOU BELIEVE HOW GOOD SHE IS??? I love this little purse so much! It is perfect. Absolutely, 100% perfect.
Evidence #2: The Nature Bowl
Taking inspiration from Soule Mama, I asked Gretchen if she could make me a nature bowl. A place where we could hold all of our seasonal treasures on the dining table, so we could see them, touch them, interact with them…
I am beyond pleased with this bowl- the tiny bowls add an extra dimension of wonder to this set up. Clara is loving switching out what goes into the little bowls. When we are out and about, she looks for things that can place in her little bowls.
Isn’t Gretchen amazing?? I *heart* all things made by hand, with care- especially when those things come from those I love. Thanks Gretchen! I am so inspired by her inspiration, I am going to do most of my holiday shopping on Etsy, or (gasp), make it myself. Wish me luck, and today I leave you with another picture of the nature bowl. Isn’t it perfect?
My dear, sweet Father sent this video to me. You know, I don’t know why people do the things they do. I really don’t. But this? This just filled me with such joy. Honestly, I was brought to tears by the end. Why? I have no idea. But I am grateful that people do these sort of crazy things and share them with the world.
Check it out. Is it not sort of “It’s a small world” for the modern era?
May your heart be an altar, from which the bright flame of unending thanksgiving ascends to heaven.
Happy (late) 4th of July, Yoginis! Independence Day for my beloved country. Last night, we attended a reception at the ambassador’s residence. Over 3,000 people came to celebrate the Independence of the United States. Many people, from many countries, expressed sincere congratulations. One gentleman even insisted that, “This day is the most important day for the whole world.” Wow.
I have a tendency to focus on the policies, people, and lifestyle choices that really annoy me in the United States (all in the name of “critical analysis”- how about calling it what it is- griping- instead of taking action). Yesterday, I was given a really powerful opportunity to reflect on the wonderful things about our country. As my husband said, “Despite who is in power, the principles that our country are founded on remain the same.”
Honest to God, I think that we are at an incredible crossroads in our history. A place to make the future a place that our grandchildren will want to (be able to) live. One of the things I love about America is the ability to rise to the occasion, do what it takes, and do it all with a distinctly American twist. I suspect that many others are tired of the infighting and seeming inaction in DC, which is why so many grassroots organizations are springing up like wildfires… I believe that Americans just like you and just like me are ready to build a new nation- reinvent ourselves and set the standard for the new world economy.
I am grateful to be in this time and this place in history. Sometimes it is scary to look ahead and not know if there is a happy ending waiting or to wonder if things are going to have to get significantly worse before they get better. But in my heart I believe that America is equal to the task at hand.
I am proud of my country and I am proud of my husband for serving in the role he does- creating ties and connections with other nations, building relationships in a climate where the US may not be viewed in the best light. He is brilliant and I know he does what he does because he deeply believes in our country. As a first generation American, he really appreciates all that the United States offers and is also an amazing example of who we are as a nation…
So, on this Independence Day weekend, what are you grateful for? What way does your community, your State, or your Nation shine for you? Remember to leave a comment if you link so I can go see what everyone is feeling grateful for! Happy 4th of July, Yoginis!
The magic number.
Check it out and join in. From craftivism to arts designed to raise awareness of climate change, this organization is well worth supporting and joining.
There is nothing better than hope to inspire action.
Although we’ve been having some internet connectivity problems, I was committed to showing up tonight to get my fill for the week. Fill of what?? Well, gratitude, of course!
As I mentioned last week, I would like to take Fridays to focus on the fullness of life- Italians have a lovely way of asking this in everyday conversation, which is loosely translated as “tell me something beautiful”. I invite you to share some of the richness of your own life on your own blog, or here, in the comments. Mr. Linky is available below for you to share your posts of gratitude with everyone, should you choose to blog it!
So without further ado…
I am intensely aware of how grateful I am to feel my days fill up with productivity. It occured to me at some point this week that as soon as Clara entered school in DC, I probably should have started looking for work outside the home. But of course, that wasn’t possible at the time. And really, the work I will be doing here just feels like a good fit for my skills. This seems to be a great place for me to offer up the best of who I am and, with any luck, help the people around me do their jobs a little better.
Having had a few weeks off from my Yoga classes, I am excited to be beginning a new month of classes next week. I enjoy developing classes around a theme, and this month we will be focusing on compassion, or, more aptly perhaps, befriending our bodies. I love to develop class plans, because it is always a great opportunity for me to think about my own practice and reflect on how a particular idea has shaped my life. Learning to honor, respect, and listen to my body with a compassionate heart and an open mind is one of my biggest life lessons, and is certainly a great benefit of engaging in a physical practice like Yoga. You can expect to hear more on this throughout the month, but for now, I am grateful for the chance to reflect on my own practice and think of ways to bring this concept to life for my students….
Tomorrow is Erick’s birthday and we will be taking a day trip to the beach. This beach to be precise. I have heard from many people that Sperlonga is a hidden treasure of beachy love on the Mediterranean. I feel a deep and abiding adoration for water, sand, sea shells, and rocks and hope to infuse Clara with this passion. Of course, my fair skin is ill-suited to long, hot, days baking on the sand, but thank goodness for beach umbrellas! You can rent them on practically any beach here and it makes for a fabulous, relaxing, burn-free day!
Lastly, I am grateful for all the wonderful bloggers that make me smile day in and day out with their fabulous, insightful, funny posts. Like her, and her, and, of course, I can’t forget her! I feel so fortunate to have collected such a wide variety of blogging friends…
Mr. Linky is waiting for your gratitude blog, Yoginis! And, as the Italians say, “Buon Weekend!”
“My private measure of success is daily. If this were to be the last day of my life would I be content with it? To live in a harmonious balance of commitments and pleasures is what I strive for.” -Jane Rule
Here I am. Whew. It’s Saturday afternoon of the Solstice. Its been a busy week here and summer has officially arrived here in Rome. It’s hot and sticky and decidedly un-airconditioned in many, many places. The result? That heavy, tired, hot feeling that just sort of lands on skin like a blanket that needs to be washed off. The kind of heat that slows everything to a crawl…
Not that I’m complaining. I am happy. I am delighted to be working again. Delighted and filled with gratitude for the opportunity to feel productive and useful in an adult sort of way. I feel like a kid in a candy store- so many projects, so little time!! I haven’t felt this energized in I can’t remember how long!
All of that being said, I am feeling challenged (in a peaceful, pleased sort of way) to strike the proper balance. You know how it is. You add something new to your life (a new pet, a new baby, a new job, a new commitment) and there is a natural rearranging that must take place to achieve balance. I am seeking that. Honestly, I feel like I went from having almost nothing to do to having a lot of commitments in a very short period of time.
It occurs to me that searching out balance is, in many ways, like surfing. There is no stasis- we are always adjusting our stance to the circumstances when we are riding a wave, or we are riding our board out, resting, or (hopefully not too much) wiping out! Life, just like surfing, is never about standing still or achieving a perfect place of stillness. I find that comforting. There is never a perfect end point. Every day brings different circumstances, everything is always changing and fluxing and shifting. Our job is to respond, gracefully, and stay up on the board, so to speak.
As you celebrate the long, warm days of summer, take a moment to reflect on your own measures of success, the balance of commitments and pleasures in your life- how they shift and change, how you respond day by day… appreciate what you do well, adjust as necessary. Happy Solstice!
Yes, I have been gone. Erick, Clara, and I went on a much needed little vacation this last weekend to a little Etruscan town in Northern Lazio, Tuscania. Erick is amazing at finding the perfect little places for our family, and this long weekend was no exception. We stayed at a beautiful agriturismo, Casa Caponetti, an amazing old farmhouse that sits on 60 acres of lush Italian countryside.
The best part of our weekend was watching Clara play outside. That may seem silly and a bit odd, but she had the opportunity to explore bushes, long grass, a frog pond, feeding horses, pigs, cows, dogs… all in a setting where I felt comfortable letting her go off without me having an eagle eye on her every move. One of the precious gifts of country living is the ability to give your children space to roam and do nothing (and everything) without parental guidance every second.
As I watched Clara play, it was bittersweet. I felt deep gratitude for my own childhood living on a fairly large piece of property with woods, a large garden, animals… it was wonderful to see Clara enjoying that same sense of wonder and delight at being outside, exploring. I felt a little sad that Clara doesn’t get to live like that day to day.
My next thought (in large part due to my ongoing gratitude practice) was to focus on the positive. Clara will be comfortable in both a city setting and in the country. I remember the first time our family moved to a big city- I was terrified and didn’t know what to expect. Because Erick and I have a deep and abiding commitment to exposing Clara to nature as often as possible, she will hopefully be at ease, and respectful, of both life in a city and a life that is closer to nature.
A month of gratitude has come and gone, and I am tempted to continue, honestly. Knowing that I will be documenting my gratitude here heightens my awareness of the blessings hidden in every nook and cranny of life. Many years of my life have been spent as a complainer and a cynic - the practice of gratitude is slowly transforming these parts of my personality that I always thought of as “fixed”- focusing on it every day has really hastened the transformation!
That being said, I think once a week will have to suffice. I would love to see a community of grateful hearts come together in the blogosphere… if you are inspired to share your own gratitude practice, please tell me. Starting next week, on Friday, I will post a Mr. Linky for your gratitude-ease.
As I pulled the rolladens up this morning, Clara tore into the room and then stopped abruptly. With rapt eyes, as only a small child can have, she asked, “Mommy, is the sun rising?” I answered in the affirmative and she began to clap excitedly- I imagine to congratulate the sun for yet another stunning performance…
I love her curiosity, imagination, and energy. It is infectious. Having a child has been the hugest blessing in my life. Ever.
Later in the morning, before teaching my Yoga class, I had time for a “coffee meditation” (see? it can all be Yoga!) and a gatha (filled with gratitude) came to me:
As I sit quietly here with my coffee,
I vow with all Beings,
To appreciate my favorite beverage,
Sip by delicious sip.
Changing lives, one Yogini at a time, starting with me.
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