Everyday Yogini

Look. We are a co-sleeping, baby-wearing, long-term-nursing sort of family here. Attachment parenting a toddler is a little more nebulous, but I like to think that I am doing a fairly good job of staying connected to Clara, despite all the crazy stuff that’s happened over the last year.

Last week, I was asked if I would be willing to spread the word about some changes over at Attachment Parenting International. I went and checked it out, and I am excited to share this information with you. If you are at all interested in staying connected to your kids with this style of parenting, I hope you will go check it out. I am thinking of taking a class on the 3-5 year old age group to get some ideas and perspective on some of the challenges of this age…

Here is the press release info:

Attachment Parenting International (API), a non-profit organization that promotes parenting practices that create strong, healthy emotional bonds between children and their parents, has several exciting changes they would like to announce, including:

• A newly redesigned web site and new logo at Attachment Parenting.org;
• Attachment parenting worldwide support forums;
• Parent Education Program - a comprehensive series of classes for every stage and age of child development from infancy through adulthood;
• A new book based on API’s Eight Principles of Attachment Parenting by API co-founders Lysa Parker and Barbara Nicholson which is expected to be available this summer;
• A series of podcasts, webinars, chats, and forums with API Advisory Board members and other supporters of AP. Future events are scheduled with Dr. Bob Sears, Dr. James McKenna, and Kathleen Kendall Tacket. Check out the events page for more information.

These are just a few of many exciting things going on at API. I hope you’ll stop by and check it out for yourself.

Even after years of practicing Yoga, I am skilled at the art of ignoring my body. Which is evidenced by my shoulder injury recently while practicing. This is also evidenced by my recent and amazing binge of all things pizza and dessert, which has led me back into a health crisis. Seriously.

I had a follow-up endoscope on Friday, so the doctors could see how the opening between my bile duct and duodenum is healing up. Well, it’s not. It is still very inflammed and I’m still experiencing intermittent pain. To add to the love, I have an ulcer in my stomach. You see, my body can yell and scream and I will whistle and cover my ears (and keep drinking coffee with pastries).

Again, my dear body is working so hard to teach me how to best live fully. In order to actually be in this moment, I have to be willing to listen and respond to what I hear. It requires a level of honesty, surrender, and respect (for myself) that is unprecedented for me. The only thing that helps diminish the pain I experience is being extremely careful with what I put in my body (which I am decidedly opposed to). I am working with a nutritional counselor as well as listening closely to what my body is saying.

And it’s working. Now that I’ve been eating nothing but whole foods and no coffee for a week and a half, I feel a lot better. The tests don’t line up with that (obviously), but they will. I believe in my body’s ability to heal itself. Some days it’s hard to muster up enough love for myself to continue with this, but I have motivation outside of my own self, thank goodness: Erick and Clara. I have found myself over the last year, increasingly distracted by pain or alternatively, eating pastries and drinking lots of coffee. Of course there has been some Yoga thrown in, but my inner experience has been this crazy pendulum: pain —– comfort self with food ——— pain ——-comfort self with food. There hasn’t been an abundance of emotional energy for Clara or Erick.

So, for now, I am gluten, dairy, soy, and coffee free. By freeing myself from these yummy, delicious things, I am (relatively) free from pain. I am also learning to drop into the discomfort in my body instead of trying to wiggle away from it. I am learning to surrender and breathe and let the pain tell me it’s story. The irony is that the more I learn to stay with the discomfort, the lesser it becomes. The more I learn to stay with my body, the more I am able to stay with Clara and Erick. I feel more awake to my life than I have since we left Colorado.

May you be well. May you all be skilled in the art of listening to the lessons in your lives. May you find yourself awake and filled with boundless gratitude for your gifts.

When befriending that which is painful,
I vow with all Beings,
To listen closely for the instruction,
Not bolt, as I would much love to do.

Today, I heard an amazing podcast on Speaking of Faith with Matthew Sanford. I was in tears during parts of the interview- a truly inspiring show.

But that’s not really the main point. Public Media is advertising a game called consumer consequence and it allows you to calculate how sustainable your lifestyle is and compare it to others. It also provides tips on reducing environmental footprint. Here is a link to the game.

I scored a 3.2, mainly because at the moment we either walk or take the bus 95% of the time. If we were back in Colorado, forget about it! One thing I have committed to here, is not buying things that need to be shipped unless I absolutely cannot find the item in Italy.

We had planned a trip to the coast over the weekend, but, well, it was pouring rain. Not even just rain, but hailing as well. Not the ideal time to explore the Italian coastline, so we were home-bound for the weekend, or so I thought. Fortunately for Clara and I, Erick had a backup plan! We hopped in the car on Saturday and headed over to Tivoli, a fairly short distance from Rome (if you don’t get stuck in traffic).

In the rain, you ask? Yes. Being Seattle-born, I’m not deterred by rain. Clara doesn’t seem inclined in that delicate direction, either, even with the liability of being born in the dry state of Colorado.

It ended up being that Saturday was the perfect day to go and check out the gardens, being Easter weekend, it was practically empty. Or maybe it was the rain, I’m not sure. We got to Tivoli just in time for a yummy lunch (is there any other kind in Italy, I ask?) and then we walked over to Villa D’Este, which is a UNESCO World Heritage Site. Now I know why- it is a beautiful treasure with a rich and varied past! As usual, I learned only one or two snippets of history because, really, it’s all about the puddles when you tour with a three year old…

To see just a tiny bit of our trip, you can go here.

I really, really love coffee.

This is my third day without coffee and I’m sad. I miss it. That zingy, sharp feeling of being buzzed and lively. But seeing as this is all about learning to listen to my body and cultivate a deep sense of loving-kindness in life, I have to give it up.

See, over the last weeks, I’ve had recurrences of the pain and discomfort that I was having pre-surgery. It’s been frustrating and exhausting and I’ve been fighting it. And losing. Which isn’t a very kind way of being with one’s body: battling and all. The only way I seem able to be pain-free at this point is with dietary changes, so, as much of a bummer as it is, I have to let go of some things that I love to eat (and drink, as in my beloved coffee).

So, in the process of giving in to the reality of the situation, there is loss but there is also this sense of stopping long enough to say, “Hey, body, what do you need? What works for you?” And I’m getting some good answers and doing my best to really listen. I’m extraodinarily grateful that I’ve been practicing Yoga and meditation long enough to be able to tune in. Ten years ago, this would not have been possible for me, that is for sure.

Surrender is an okay place to be, much to my suprise.

Thank you all so much for your supportive, positive comments on my menus for this week. Both events are over and they went well. The St. Patrick’s Day menu was a bigger hit than last night, but both were well recieved.

I have to say, by Tuesday night (we went to a reception that night) I was completely wiped out. As we already had another dinner planned for Wednesday, it was necessary to just work with it and not get all cranky and bent out of shape about being overscheduled. Even though I had things I “needed” to do, I went to bed early on Tuesday. I noticed that I felt guilty going to bed- and I didn’t sleep well. Wednesday morning I was blurry and tired and had so. much. to. do.

At the last minute, I decided to simplify Wednesday’s menu so I wouldn’t have as much to do- we had rice instead of potatoes and fresh fruit for dessert instead of the crisp. It worked out famously and I got to take a nap before the dinner, which I desperately needed.

The theme of what I noticed was the undue pressure I put on myself to do EVERYTHING. And quite frankly, I simply cannot at this point in my life. From standing over the stove all day Monday and then standing around in high heels all night, I had a relapse of the tingling and numbness in my arm. When I push myself beyond my limits, my body- good friend- let’s me know that it’s too much. The silly thing is, I don’t *have* to do everything. I have full permission to relax and enjoy myself. Why don’t I?

This is such a fundamental question to Mothers everywhere. Maybe people everywhere. Why do we manufacture ways to be too-busy with little details instead of focusing our energy on our kids, our families, our well-being? Does it really matter if the croutons are made from homemade foccacia? Will it be noticeably better if the soups are made with homemade broth vs. store bought? I really don’t think so.

So next time, I will start out with the intent to do less and enjoy more. I will not worry at all about including Clara in the function- after all, it’s my house. I will not hesitate to use the resources that I have available to me to take the pressure off. I refuse to believe that my worth is somehow going to be measured by niggling details- I know Clara isn’t going to remember that I made the broth. She will most likely remember that I was distracted by cooking and not paying attention to her!

Are there things that you do that you don’t have to do? Self-manufactured pressure? Is there anything you can let go of in order to give yourself a little breathing space?

Here in Italy, it’s a long weekend for Easter. We are planning a visit to the beach and a picnic. I wish you all a wonderful, relaxing weekend!

So, as I prepare for this week’s big events in our home, I am menu planning. It’s a tricky balance. I lean in the vegetarian direction with lots of whole grains, but from all the events I’ve attended so far? Uh, people aren’t going to be all that excited about my food. I could be wrong. I hope so. Here is what I’m serving… what do you think?

Monday’s St. Patrick’s Day Menu

Appetizers
Stuffed mushrooms
Spring rolls

Primo Piatto
Spinach Soup with Rosemary Croutons

Secondo Piatto
Salmon cakes with dill sauce
Wild Rice

Contorno
Simple Salad with tomato and this amazing little green that looks like four leaf clovers

Dolce
Dark Chocolate Cake with fresh berries

In addition, I am making focaccia to make the croutons from and I just finished making the broth for the soup…

And for Wednesday’s dinner, the menu will be:

Appetizers
Vegetable pakora
Stuffed mushrooms (again)

Primo Piatto
Roasted tomato soup

Secondo Piatto
Balsamic Chicken with peppers
Crispy roasted potatoes

Contorno
Insalata mista

Dolce
Pear and apple crisp with vanilla gelato

So here are my weak points: Appetizers. I am really bad with thinking up appetizers. Honestly, I would serve focaccia and stuffed mushrooms all the time, but Erick doesn’t like that idea. I also feel like maybe I’m not giving our guests enough choices. And, as I mentioned, I am a bit worried that it’s on the “too healthy” side. For all you chefs out there, do you have any last minute ideas or additions??

I’m off to make the cake and chill it overnight.

Today we had the pleasure of attending an Easter Egg hunt for the kiddos that “belong” to the Embassy here in Rome. It was another gorgeous spring day and the event was held at Villa Taverna (the Ambassador’s residence). As you can see, even the statues got into the festivities by holding little plastic eggs for the kids to find.

We weren’t really sure Clara was going to “get” the whole ‘hunt for eggs’ thing, but she walked away with quite a collection… she was proud, proud, proud of herself and, for whatever reason, I was proud right along with her! What a girl! I didn’t see her “steal” a single egg from another child, either.

What I loved most about this event was 1. I had a chance to meet some other parents of small children here in Rome and 2. Clara met a little girl who lives nearby that she really, really had a great time playing with! Being the complete geek that I am, it practically brought me to tears. Even better, the little girls were running pretty far away and I wasn’t worried they were going to get run over by a stray motorino… it was really, really wonderful. To see all the pictures, go here.

After our big day out, we topped it all off by stopping at a gelateria to enjoy some gelato (I personally had the soy chocolate gelato). Erick had two servings, since he’s running the Rome Marathon tomorrow. That guy.

Speaking of insanity, this week is going to be quiet here on the blog. Part of our job here is to host little parties in our home. I know, I know, it’s tough having to entertain, huh? In any case, this week we are hosting TWO dinners in our home. Can you hear the deep, belly breathing that I’m using to stay calm? I will be back later in the week with lots of insightful Yogic wisdom gleaned from our very full social calendar this week.

When the trees blossom pink and it’s sunny,
I vow with all Beings,
To bask in the beauty of Spring time,
Go outside, and hear all the birds sing!

It is gorgeous here in Rome today. I think I can say that Spring has officially arrived. The cherry trees are already dropping their little petals in the wind and people are stripping off the fur coats (that they really didn’t needs in the first place…). I went for a walk today in Villa Ada and I was blown away by how absolutely beautiful and serene the park is. I am also extraordinarily grateful that it is practically our back yard.

I’ve decided that winter is a particularly difficult time of year to arrive in a new city, because a city cannot really be at it’s best during the cold hibernation of winter. Now that nature is working her stuff here in the city, it is like being in a different place altogether.

Can you tell? I have Spring Fever! So, please, Yoginis, cut me some slack. I want to go outside and play a bit. I will post for sure, but life is coming into full bloom and it is time to enjoy the abundance and beauty of nature (before mosquito season)!